I believe everything in life happens for a reason + everyone has a purpose, whether you know it or not. Just because you experienced a lot of pain and suffering doesn't mean there's no hope left in the world or even in the rest of humanity. Not everyone in the world is a judgemental asshole. There are still people who will care + listen, you just have to find them. There is someone out there who loves you. I love you. Don't loose hope.